Chains

A year ago I was standing on a field in a purple robe and  throwing a graduation cap. Yesterday I was in a sihn and a flower pinned to my skirt. A year exactly has passed from graduating high school. Yesterday was a day for nostalgia not only because I graduated but also because my students graduated. That is funny to say because just a year ago I was a student and now I am teaching them. I have been in Laos for nine months and have gotten to know these wonderful people and now it is time to part. These  wonderful students have taught me so much, are such joys to teach and have made my time here is Laos the best it could be and I will miss them immensely.

Mee and Pha

Yai and Noy

Pou

Soukieng

Boua and Thoy

 I have recently been reading Great Expectations by Charles Dickens, I felt a necessity to start reading all the classics. There was this quote that has really been sticking with me:

"Imagine one selected day struck out of it, but think how different its course would have been. Pause and think for a moment of the long chain of iron or gold, of thorns or flowers, that would never have bound you, but for the formation of the first link on one memorable day."

It really did make me pause and think about the chains that we create in our lives. The faithful day I decided to come to Laos and graduation and coming to Laos and the day I left my family. These chains have linked to so many things in my life. And thinking about graduation and how many chains this will cause in my students lives, the things that they have learned at ARDA have created links for their future already. Think about how different life would be if I went to school, if I chose a different chain? I am glad I chose this chain because I wouldn't change this experience for the world. Getting to know and love these students has truly made my year here. The experience I have had here hopefully in the future will create chains to come back to Laos. This  year I though would just be a nice time away to learn and grow and serve these people but in reality God is making chains for the future. When I first came I thought that I would be the one teaching but I have learnt so much for these students. So here is to the chains we create and to the future!

Things I will miss

It seems crazy to think that I only have about two more months in Laos! I am happy to be going home but also sad to say goodbye to this beautiful place. Here are my top ten things I will miss:

1. ARDA Skills.
My students, the staff, sewing class, dinner at skills, bible studies, English class, puppy, the Lor's. All of it I will miss so much.

2. Green Mangos
Green mangoes are my favorite snack. They are unripe and sometimes they can be sweet and sometimes sour. You dip them in jeo which is sauce and the sauce to the left is chili with sugar ( MSG too but I try to not admit that I eat it) and to the right is 'nam pha' which means fish water but it has squid juice, red peppers and other spices. Sounds kinda gross but it's actually good. At ARDA we have a mango tree so in April we had mangoes almost every day! The sad thing is there are no green mangoes in America so I will miss them quite a lot.




3. Jeo.
These are my two favorite foods in Laos. Jeo means sauce in Lao. To the left is eggplant and to the right is tomato. You dip these in sticky rice. We tend to have jeo everyday or maybe three times a week. There are many other types of jeo too but these are my favorite. I have even tried frog jeo and cricket jeo!




4. Kinley, Rachel, Crystal.
The girls that have become my family here. I will miss each one dearly.




5. Motorbike
I have actually gotten to enjoy going on my motorbike, though at first I was scared now it is nice to have freedom and explore the streets of Vientiane.



6. Nita students.
So cute and sometimes naughty I have enjoyed spending time with them and now that it's coming to the end I know that I will miss them. They keep asking me lately " Can I come back home with you?" It's so cute and breaks my heart.


7. MCC Staff.
Working and spending time with them has been so fun. I will miss staff meetings and all the time that I have gotten to spend time with them.



8. Host family
 All my cousins and aunts and uncles and especially Patty.



9. Vientiane/ all I have visited
I will miss the great city of Vientiane and all of Laos and it's beautiful countryside.





10.Friends
I have had the pleasure of meeting lots of friends in Laos and I will miss them quite a lot.





I read this quote that was talking about leaving a place and that it's true you that you will miss that place but you will also miss what you were doing and who you spent it with but you will also miss who you were at this time because another time like this will never happen again and the time you spend there is now a part of you. I have been thinking about this lately and finding it true that this is the only time in my life where this will be this and I can't come back here and it be all the same. It has seemed weird to me that life goes on in America and of course it does. I keep expecting life back in America to be the same but it won't be and so sometimes I get scared but in reality I shouldn't be scared. And plus I have already left there and have already moved on without even acknowledging it. So why would I have to worry? Why would I have to be scared when I have Jesus on my side and when I have already have done something much more scary. You see this is only the beginning of my life and I have so many adventures to live. So here is to one adventure ending and a new one starting. I'll miss you Laos!

Weeping

I had just spent the week out and about in Laos when I checked Facebook. I read all at once about a family friend Mark Breen had pasted away and the bombing in Massachusetts. And I couldn't help but cry. For these lives and these people and these families. Why heart goes out to Amy, Nic and Tushka and all the families that were affected. I watched Obama's speech and how he says,  

“Yes, we will find you,” he said. “And, yes, you will face justice. We will find you. We will hold you accountable, but, more than that, our fidelity to our way of life, to a free and open society, will only grow stronger — for God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity but one of power and love and self discipline, and every one of us stands with you." 

And it struck me how strange it is too have people who will stand with you. That we have a country that continues to fight for justice and are not afraid or timid of any power. That three people died and justice is served right away. Where else in the world can you say that?  Millions of people live in fear everyday and have no power and no justice. Even in Laos, people live in fear and are afraid of the government. People in Afghanistan live in constant fear everyday. To think the country suffered more than 15,00 incidents involving explosive devices (IEDs) in 2012 is outrageous. An article in the Washington post talked about: Afghans send sympathy and love to Boston, whose pain they know all to well.
(http://www.washingtonpost.com/blogs/worldviews/wp/2013/04/17/photos-afghans-send-sympathy-and-love-to-boston-whose-pain-they-know-all-too-well/) 

 “Every time I hear about attacks happening,” she said, “whether it’s in the United States, Pakistan, England or here, I became too sad. All those people had hopes and dreams for their futures. Their parents had hopes and dreams for their futures. It doesn't matter that we experience this more often here. No one should experience any of it ever. It’s always the innocent who suffer.” -Frozan Rahmani

This is how people should respond. We can weep and we can say that we live in a cruel world. And we can seek justice and peace. But not an eye for an eye . We are continuing to put more and more evil and ugly  into the world. Why are you teaching us it's okay to kill people and it's okay to fight fire with fire? Why are we continuing to do what we always do? We all know it hasn't been working. We should we working towards peace, towards respect and love. We should be standing with people.

A friend of mine said this: 

"President Obama continues to defend US drone policy as an effective and "ethical" way to fight terrorism. I ask: what is the ethical difference between the innocent lives lost as the result of a bomb in Boston and the innocent lives lost as collateral damage from U.S. counter terrorism policies? 

There are many ways to fight terrorism effectively and peacefully, including educating and empowering women, working to end poverty and support economic growth, and putting an end to the hypocrisy, extremism, and religious intolerance that exists within our own country. But none of these efforts towards peace will be taken seriously if U.S. drone strikes continue to claim innocent lives and spread fear for civilians in Pakistan, in Yemen, and in Somalia."


I weep for the life of Mark Breen and for these families that have lost the ones they love and the millions of others that have lost their lives.  I hope their memories are honored and I praise Jesus that there is no more suffering and no more pain. Our lives are short so why prolong the pain and suffering?  Instead lets show love and compassion and peace. 

"Let us not use bombs and guns to overcome the world. Let us use love and compassion. Peace begins with a smile. Smile five times a day at someone you don't really want to smile at; do it for peace. Let us radiate the peace of God and so light His light and extinguish in the world and in the hearts of all men all hatred and love for power." -Mother Teresa

Nineteen.

It seems weird to think that I am nineteen. It seems weird to think that that is the age that I really am.It seems to me that nineteen is something others think I am not as well. It's common in Laos to lie about your age. So I thought I would follow along with everyone else and say I was older than I am. But the thing is I feel much older than I am. Laos instilled in me many responsibilities and in a way made me grow up. But in another ways Laos gave me all these opportunities to have made me feel like I am much older. The life I have lived so far has been nothing less then adventurous. I have seen more then most and for that I feel older and also grateful. But in reality I am nineteen. I do have many responsibilities and I also do have a lot of life to live. But also a lot to learn. To think last year on my birthday, I was in California with my family. I had little knowledge of what I was going to be doing in a year. I was thinking about college and about what to do with my life and now where am I but in Laos. It seems like a lifetime ago that I was in America. Especially in times like birthdays and holiday's to be so far away from my family. I dream of the days when I can hug my mom and dad and laugh with my sisters and hang out with my friends. I dream of  jamba juice and the falafel and mexican food. And I can't wait for the days that those dreams will come true. But then I think of about....What about a year from now? I'll be dreaming about the hug from my friends and the high pitches laughing of my students. I'll dream about all the Sabaidee's and Phop gawn mai's (Hello and see you later in Lao) I'll dream about the sticky rice and green mango's and lao food. And those dreams will take a long time to come true if they ever will. It seems outrageous that there is only four more months in Laos. How the time flies. How the times flies and then you realize that you are only nineteen and have lots of life to live. And what a joy that is.

Lucky

Recent events:
- I got my kitten stolen by Vietnamese people
-I got new kittens
-Bringing my new kittens home I got a dog bite
-My new kittens are crazy
-I told my mom I got a dog bite
-My mom freaked out
- Chaos rained down
- My dog bite started turning green and got a little swolen
-I deduced I should go to the doctor
-I freaked out that I might have rabies
-I went to the doctor
-I don't have rabies.


  But the thing is that here in Laos if you do get bite by a dog it's no little thing and rabies are something that people here can die from.
  I could have died too, but I had medical attention and good medical attention.
  One day a ARDA one of the girls had a stomach ache. She had eaten payapa salad (which is pretty hard on your digestion, I would know I've gotten sick from it) and also pepsi. All the forgieners instanly thought oh it's just heartburn, but to the girls it was way more. She was rushed to the hospital and many of the girls were so worried that they cried. Going to the hospital is very serious here, due to the fact that the medical care for patients is not very good. For example my Lao grandmother. When I first came to Laos she was talking and walking and healthy, about two months later she was very ill she couldn't walk and talk and she was taken to the hospital multiple times. They ran tests and found that she had cancer. Then a couple weeks later she went back to the hospital and they said it was actually just an upset stomach. An upset stomach was highly unplausible due to the fact that she was close to death. And that is when I realized that the hospitals are trying but have now idea. Now to my point. I am truely so lucky to have health care and not be afraid when something happens because I have doctor and knowledgable people all around me. Where here the reality of getting sick might cause death. It again reminds me off how lucky we are in America.
This past week I read a book called Conflict by Nelson Rand, which talked about his experiences in south east asia as a journalist and seeing all the conflicts it holds. I hadn't even realized in the place I traveled to that there was so much conflict. Where we learn about World War 2 and all the horrors that happened there we don't even know of the horrible holocaust in Cambodia and the millions killed by the Khmer Rouge. In Laos hundreds of Hmong men were still fighting a war that was supposed to be finished almost fourty years before. In Thailand many were killed just for their race. It just amazes me the things we don't know and what we take for granted. While I was eating mac and cheese, Hmong families were eating tree pulp to stay alive. I am so lucky. I am also so thankful that I have a home and a family and a safe place to live with food and water. Where many families have no homes, no families and are never in a safe place and have to fight for their lives and even the food they eat. I recommend you read that book. It just shows how much we have to be thankful for. But also something to strive for to give back to others.
   The reality that I have a comfortable life back in America just keeps me accountable to what I am meant to do here. Millions of people don't have that reality. And it just reminds me that those millions of people are happy anyway. In the book it talks about how even in all their turmoil they still smiled and continued to strive for their freedom. The reality that we can be happy anywhere is something to also remember.
Things to remember: You are lucky, you can be happy anywhere and watch out for rabid dogs.

ARDA Skills

ARDA Skills 

Though I haven't talked about them very much I should because they are wonderful people and it is a wonderful place. Being there for about four months I have found wonderful friends and it has been a joy working there. Let me introduce the staff to you:

Anna and their youngest Simon

Kipp

Kipp and Anna:

Kipp is the director of skills and we have found that we are similar in many ways. He is from Colorado! And we have the same birthday! He and his wife share the same love of coffee as me. Anna is Kipp's wife and she went to North Park University the same place I am going! They have five children: Josiah, Asia, Levi, Kian and Simon. It has been wonderful to get to know their family and they have taken me under the wing.

Jaime teaching her business class 

 Jaime:

Jaime teaches business class and we teach English together this semester. It has been nice to have someone that is learning about Lao together and we can both struggle with language together. She has become a great friend this semester and been quite helpful.

 Heuang:

Heuang taught the cooking class last semester and she as well has become a good friend. Heuang has a loud laugh and she always makes me laugh. This semester she is helping around the office and so she has been helping me finish the skills cookbook to later give to the students as well as sell.

 Joy:

Joy is the administrative staff and as well teaches childcare and cleaning. She is also quite funny and her most recognizable quality is her fast speaking.

 Justin:

Justin teaches computers and auto shop as well he helps in the electricity class. Justin is also spirited and when with Subin it becomes chaos.

 Subin:

Subin is the translator and teaches the computer class with Justin. He has had a lot of work on his hands because of all of the American staff need lots of translating. The best way to describe Subin would be to call him blonde. He is quite gullible and that makes him all the more funny.

Pem and Tian:

Pem helps me in my sewing class and is wonderful at sewing as well as helping translate. In the future I will hand over the class to her and she will then teach sewing. She is also quite funny and makes me laugh with her learning English. She has been a joy to work with and it is good spending time with her. Tian is Pem's husband and he teaches the electricity class and helps in auto among other things.

English class

Some of the students

The students:

I teach all twelve of the girls for sewing. The girls names are Mee, Pha, Noy, Thoy, Boua, Sara, Souk hieng, Da, Nang, Pou, Melia and Yai. For English I teach the student leaders we call them the four. Which is Mee, Long, Tola and Se. In the class we have six students Ja, Koua, Pou, Noy, Boua and Thoy.

On Thursdays I teach sewing from 8-12

On Fridays I teach sewing from 8-10 and English from 10:10- 12

Hope that gives you more insight to my enjoyable time at ARDA Skills.  

We had a watermelon eating contest and Kipp though it would be funny to add some chicken on top. It surprised me.

Mee and Pha asking questions about the sewing machine

Watermelon eating contest next to me is Pem 

Me and Yai we had a game night at the Mekong

Commitment

This month has been the months of reports for MCC and so I have been working on a report called Performance Appraisal Report. One question they asked really struck me:

In what ways does the work you do parallel your understanding of MCC’s purpose and vision statement: “Mennonite Central Committee (MCC), a worldwide ministry of Anabaptist churches, shares God's love and compassion for all in the name of Christ by responding to basic human needs and working for peace and justice. MCC envisions communities worldwide in right relationship with God, one another and creation.”

At this point and time it seems that the fruit I am bearing here is non-existent and at times it can cause you get down on yourself. Being a Secondary teacher having 13 classes spanned over three days and students up to 60 in each class and the students can only speak Lao tends to get overwhelming. But then I read things like this that tell me that is not what it is all about. Sure teaching students English is important and is a valued skill and you are helping in what ways you can, but what is more important is the other ways you are teaching them. I am teaching them love and compassion and showing that it's important to care for humans. I am teaching them what non-violence and justice are in a world where corporal punishment is the law. I am showing right relationships with students and teachers and respect. I am showing God's love and that is all that matters. 

“The more I think about the meaning of living and acting in the name of Christ, the more I realize that what I have to offer to others is not my intelligence, skill, power, influence, or connections, but my own human brokenness through which the love of God can manifest itself…hope is not based on any power to solve the problems of those with whom we live, but on the love of God, which becomes visible when we let go of our fears of being out of control and enter into His presence in a shared confession of weakness.”—Henry Neuwen”

I think coming here on this journey shows you that that is truly all that matters that we love people like God loves us. I have lately been thinking about commitment and how especially in this time in my life that this is really when you commit to something. For most people its college and a major or a certain job and though that is important is it really worth committing your life to? What really is worth committing your life to?

With this fallen world and nothing that stays constant I find it hard to commit to one thing. But what I have realized here is that there is one thing that is never changing, everlasting and all encompassing. God. And I think that is worth committing to. I want to commit to love and peace, to justice and hope. I want to commit to loving the children of the world and showing them what peace and justice and hope really is. And that is just what I will do.